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Medical Marijuana (6): A Conundrum

This post is a little late, not that anyone but me takes notice of these things, but I have a dilemma. As I mentioned last time "an experimental anomaly" has arisen. In my perfect world the effects of medical marijuana would be a high level of pain alleviation coupled with a low level of mental alteration. I would hurt less and not get high.

Unfortunately, it seems the same chemical properties of cannabis that contribute to pain relief also deal out the marijuana buzz. After several instances of being 'too high' I was considering abandoning my medical marijuana investigation when a friend pointed out that I had, over time, completely overcome the deleterious side effects of hydrocodone. Might not I be able to do the same with cannabis?

My approach has been to inhale or ingest mini-doses to minimize the buzz of the marijuana. That, however, means delivering micro-doses of pain relief to a macro-pain problem. Therefore, I am going to institute a new protocol using the higher dose approach to see if indeed I will adjust to the side effects. In the next few days I will acquire another batch of products in several "delivery modalities" and begin phase two of my foray into personal human experimentation.

Below, good news, a product that does work without side effects.

PRODUCT REPORT: Tincture of Cannabis

Several providers produce a topical tincture of cannabis spray, usually alcohol based liquids. One dispensary (Harborside in Oakland) has a two part product, often referred to as being like "the two ingredients in epoxy." You spray on the alcohol based part one, let it dry and then rub on the cream based second part. Even though my pain comes from a deep spinal deformity, I find the tincture relieves topical pain and relaxes the surface muscles. If I use the product fifteen minutes before my stretching exercises, I have more range of motion and less pain while exercising. I would recommend this product, to those with arthritis and joint pain, particularly for use on the hands, neck and elbows; areas with close skin surface access.

Previous posts in this series:
Medical Marijuana (5): The Patients
Medical Marijuana (4): Botanical Chemistry
Medical Marijuana (3): Human Experimentation
Medical Marijuana (2): The Dispensary

Afghan White Widow
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Maps

Middle Earth (Lord of the Rings)

Land of Oz

Neverland (Disney's not Jackson's)

Earthsea (Ursula Le Guin)

Hogwart's (Marauder's Map)

Map of the Verse (Firefly)

Population of Imaginary Friends (USA-2006)
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Online Dating Reflections


Today the semi-serious side of sex and relationship in the age of online introductions. It's not really online dating, unless you consider anonymous texting a date. But we live in the age of the net and much bantered about numbers suggest that one in every four new relationships begin on the web.


My history with online introductions is over twenty years in the making. I was an early adopter with many forays into web-based dating in the last two decades. The result has been way too many coffee dates for a guy who doesn't drink coffee and an overall dissatisfaction with my limited success. It seemed to me that I lacked commitment to the endeavor; yet, when I really focused my intention to using the various services and meeting "the" woman, I did meet more women but with even more frustration, failure and coffee.


I took a fresh look at the whole world of online relationship initiation when a friend had not only success but big-time, over-the-top, super-duper, approaching soul-mate success.


I have discussed this with male friends, who have also dipped their cyber-toes into the fertile waters of the internet. I was surprised to find that my profiles tend to elicit more responses than most, so it's not that I don't draw initial interest. It's the follow through that lacks - well, lacks follow through. Which, in my mind, leads to the conclusion that I am doing something wrong. I have tweaked my profile, tried humor and linked to this blog. My 100 Things About Me link has gotten dozens of responses, but without the big click.


So when my friend found her guy, I thought I should take another look at her approach. Luckily she is a writer and has several excellent posts about her experience. Her early frustrations seemed to mirror mine and when she reached the promised land I was more than intrigued.


I am a bit envious because she manages to articulate the ins and outs of online encounters without trashing the men who have not risen to her standards. I have never been able to accomplish this in the dozen or more posts I have drafted and trashed in the past 4+ years. Before this week, nary a word has been written on this blog about online dating. Today I offer two insights - one for you fellow seekers and one for me.


If you have tried online dating or intend to, I strongly recommend you take some time to read the writings of my now successfully relationed friend. Here is a link to her most recent post which has internal links to half a dozen or so previous commentaries on the entire process of finding someone online. I promise the time you spend reading her reflections will save you endless hours of online frustration and numerous uncomfortable cups of coffee.


One point she makes I am taking to heart. She stopped following the formula of the online dating sites; she ignored the "likes & dislikes", put aside the "family history" and the "books, movies and exercise" questions. This produced a new profile which she wrote is: "a straight forward statement of what I was seeking." That rang a big bell for me.


Apparently my profile represents me pretty well, but it really doesn't deal with what I am seeking in a relationship. Notice the line does not read "what I am seeking in a woman." Fatal flaw of many online daters is the assumption that they are fully formed and once they dangle their perfect partner description into the dating waters, the perfect man or woman will arise. 


If you have a "perfect partner" list - burn it. What you need, what I need, is a clear statement of what you/I/we seek in a relationship. My friend saw that and she rewrote her profile to conform to her relationship goal. A few months later, it found her. So ....


When I come back from my impending fall road trip, assuming I do not stumble on true love or a reasonable facsimile while on the road; when I come back I am rewriting my profile to address my relational wants, needs and desires. If it worked for Arlene . . .

To my friends, advisors, warlocks and crystal-gazers who have attempted to help me in the past - many thanks but I think I am going to go with this plan for the immediate future. The voodoo totems, genital acupuncture and full moon sacrifices of politicians will be on hold for now.
--
art: Luci Gutierrez - NYT
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Seeking SWF with Big Lens

I have been seeking that someone special for a very long time. Most recently I have updated my "needs list" to include a woman who has a good camera with a big telephoto lens. You see I have this really big view and I just can't capture it with my really tiny instrument...

What do I have to offer? In no particular order: big bed, big stories, big brain and this really big view.

On a clear day - the Bay Bridge and San Francisco.

Bay Area weather is nothing if not changeable.

and since we view is due West . . .

Among other things, the woman of my dreams should possess: photoshop and a enormous level of acceptance of over-the-top metaphors.

I would also add that I am about to embark on another of my periodic road trips. This one begins in two weeks and will last a bit over two months. More on that later, including my big reveal on my new approach to online dating, which I will implement upon my return to the Bay area later this fall.

Tomorrow - the writing that led to this week's focus on relationships.
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Sex and the Single Senior

Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions. -Woody Allen

Yes, he did that thing with his adopted daughter and yes, he keeps making the same movie over and over again. But when Woody was good, he was really, really good. However, this post is not about Woody Allen, it is rather about some thoughts prompted by that quote of his and women of a certain age.

That age would be - my age. Middle age, probably more correctly late middle age. But it's hard to tell, what with the actuarial tables being what they are today. Old age keeps getting older and middle age seems to be expanding. Here again the lump in the esophagus of society we the Baby Boomers caused in the 60s has now become the intestinal blockage of the national process and we all know where that will lead further down the country's collective alimentary canal. OK, that's as far as my scatologically adverse sensitivities will allow this metaphor to proceed; besides today's topic was meant to be sex. I probably never should have allowed Woody's mental excentricities into my head this morning.

Sex and the single woman of my generation, which means in the neighborhood of sixty years of age, I have a few observations. I am not speaking to those who are still or are once again in LTRs. No this is about being back in the game with wisdom or at least experience. "Sex in the Sixties" without the tie-dye.


Two intertwined but very different items to discuss - being post-romance and/or being post-sex.


There is a small but not that small minority of women who are post-sex. There probably are a few men in this category as well and some of both genders who are there as a result of medical issues. I exempt them from my comments. I am talking about those who have decided that sex and sexual intimacy is no longer of interest. Make whatever judgments you like, I have already made mine and will keep them to myself but I do wish to say - If you are no longer going to participate in sexual congress with any partner, you really have an obligation to disclose this fairly early in potential dating situations.


I mean, you have no problem letting us know you are vegan, diabetic or a scuba diver; asexuality or non-sexuality should be on the list of early disclosures. In fact, in my not so humble opinion, a discussion of sex and sexual wants, needs and desires should be so much easier at our age. News flash - it really isn't 'all we are looking for' these days. Sure there are still Lotharios and playas in the dating pool but a lot of them have drowned or need at least an hour for the blue pill to take effect.


As much as I feel a lifestyle of post-sex should be disclosed, even more significant is post-romance. I have come to feel that there are many, many more women who have relinquished romance to the bier of youth. Probably in the wake of one or more bad marriages; these ladies, in large numbers, have no interest in another "big" relationship. Got it, but you really ought to disclose it.


One of the online dating sites I have frequented has a question that asks your reaction to the term "making love." My answer is that it refers to a very specific kind of sex, one among many. However, I have coffee dated several women and read profiles of many more who are either opposed to "love making" or, as one women put it, "I don't indulge in that level of fantasy anymore." These women are not post-sexual at all, but they are post-romance. 

To finish today on a positive note - there are many members of my generation on both sides of the fence who can and do engage in healthy but varied sexual relationships in dating situations. Others find such interaction to be insignificant in what they seek in a later life partner. My only suggestion is be upfront with what you want or at least what you think you want, but be open to the earth moving without you seeing it coming.
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Sex Week

Alright yes, perhaps the title should be "Relationship Week" but why scare away readers by using the "R" word. Sex sells! I would also offer that the picture above will be the most inappropriate of the week, but I really liked the curves of the chair. Did you know that tongue in cheek makes it difficult to speak but has no effect whatsoever on using the keyboard.

I have had several posts on the subject of sex rumbling around in my brain and other organs for awhile now, as I mentioned last week I was finally prompted to get them all out by the writing of a friend who has found love online. OK, so she hasn't yet used the "L" word in public, but she has changed her facebook status to "in a relationship" - the one true sign of commitment in the 21st century.

While we are fencing with the "R" word, I would note that I have not made the standard remarks about only boyz being the ones afraid of it. Nay, one of my observations from my forays into the world of online dating is that the girlz are a bit more quiet about their big "R" fears but they seem to have a fair level of relational angst hidden beneath any come hither speech; they just don't flaunt it with zeal as do some of my fellow Y-chromosome creatures.

So, my preliminary online dating observations in bullet point presentation:

• when I use the word 'intelligent' and blatantly flash my Ph.D. I am trying to convey a message, so why do women who contact me based on my profile then find me too cerebral?

• age matters, take a look at any reunion photograph from the 50s, 60s, or 70s; ever wonder how those people could possibly be the same age? this goes for not just for external looks, but also spirit, energy and worldview; just because we are the same chronological age does not mean we see the world the same or interact with it alike.

• liberal and conservative do not mix in a couple, at least not in my world; opposites do not attract, if you are a republican we have zero possibilities, if you are a democrat - well maybe, but you can't be card carrying.

• you are not going to change me, but more importantly how have you gotten to our age and not figured this one out for yourself?

Now I know that so far these initial observations have a bit of a negative spin; I just needed to get some of the basic power points out of the way up front. The rest of the week will be reflections on the state of "R", "C" & even "L" in my world. In the final post of the week, I will disclose my new plan of action forged in the tepid fires of online coffee dates.

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Never Miss a Scintillating Blog Post Again

SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION WARNING

I know how hard it can be to wait by your computer for yet another literary eruption from this here corner of the blogosphere. Heaven forbid you should miss the story of little timmy and his pet manatee lost in the wilds of mid-twentieth century michigan. 

Fear not! You can now get an email notice when a fresh and refreshing post appears on this - your source for all things not so significant. No need to endlessly send your browser seeking for updates on Keeping Your Head in (All) the Game(s). Now the internet will call you!

Over there on the right is a brand new widget, right below 2007 in the archive list. Just enter your email eddress and the ever and always on-duty silicon gremlins of blogger will let you know when I post new and exciting bon mots of great import or otherwise. The service sends you a complete copy of each post with art work.

Sign up now!!!

Tomorrow we return you to our regular non-commercial programming.

There appears to be about a 12 hour lag between a post going live and the email notices going out, so if you just can't wait. . .
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